How old are your kids and how long have you lived in Westport? I’m Ryan Smith. My kids are Blake and Cole, twin 10-year olds, (soon to be fifth-graders), and we’ve lived in Westport for four years.
What has been the hardest thing about raising kids and working full time with long hours? The hardest thing is realizing you can’t be there for all of the most fun and important moments of their lives. I work early-morning hours, so I’ve had countless events and occasions I’ve had to miss. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard them say “please can you come Daddy?”, and to say no breaks my heart. Whenever I can, I try to be fully present with them when I am around, and make those moments count.
How did you end up where you are now in terms of your job, or whatever passion project it is you might be doing? I had a winding route to being an ESPN anchor. I started off as a lawyer for a football team out of law school, then worked for big firms in New York. After over a decade of practicing a mix of sports, entertainment and corporate law, I started doing legal commentary on television in my spare time. Eventually, I transitioned to working as an anchor on Court TV, HLN (formerly headline news), then working for ABC News as a correspondent and legal analyst, and eventually added anchor to a similar role at ESPN.
What is your favorite family activity to do in Westport or the surrounding towns? We have a tradition every week called “family meal”. The four of us – my wife Dafina, myself and the kids – take turns selecting a restaurant once weekly (so everyone gets a “pick” every four weeks). Then, we go out to that person’s “pick” that week, and eat a meal together, with nothing to fuel us other than our own conversation. Not only do we get to sample some of the best food Westport has to offer (my kids will tell you the best pizza is Frank Pepe!), but more than anything, no matter what’s happening with any of us that week, we all get to sit down and, for an hour or so, really talk to each other and communicate.
What was your most memorable family vacation and why? My most memorable vacation was a trip we took this year to the Swiss Alps. Dafina suggested it and made it all happen. What made this so memorable was that we all hate cold weather (especially her). Not only that…none of us ski! So when she suggested it, my first thought was “no way!” But we went anyway, and it turned out to be the trip of a lifetime. All of us overcame our dread of the cold, and by the end of it, all of us were skiing, with the kids skiing portions of black diamonds! It was truly amazing…and it showed me that we can have fun together wherever we go.
What is your proudest daddy moment? Ugh…there are thousands of moments! But I can tell you about one recently. A parent in Westport came up to me a few months ago and said “I have a younger child that adores your boys. They are so nice to (the child) and include them in every game no matter what.” She later explained it’s rare for her to see kids being so nice to younger kids, and that made her so happy. That just made me beam with pride – that we’re raising children who are not just good people, but good to all people, no matter how old they are, especially younger kids. As a youngest child myself, I like to think my kids would have included me even if I was little…that’s a great feeling.
What’s your favorite app or gadget right now? I’d love to say something novel here, but I can’t live without my iPad.
What’s your favorite sport to play and/or watch (who do you root for?) And/or what’s your workout of choice? My favorite sport to watch – football, by far (Go Eagles! I’m a Philly native). To play? football…but probably getting too old for that. Nowadays, I like playing lacrosse with my kids. Workout? Weightlifting at the gym – I love Edge Gym at the border of Norwalk and Westport!
What’s your favorite restaurant in town? Frank Pepe’s! Second choice is Sophie’s Pizza Bar in Fairfield.
What is one thing people would be surprised to know about you? I love horror movies. The scarier the better. If you can name it, I’ve seen it – twice.
If you had 24 hours to do whatever you wanted – what would you do? Workout, nap, read a good book, watch scary movies and Teen Titans with the kids…rinse…repeat.
What is your greatest regret? Not getting married and having kids earlier…but honestly I was definitely not ready for any of it until I got all of the “New York City” out of me, so I guess it all worked out.
What’s your drink of choice? I don’t drink, but I’ll take a great cigar if you’re offering!
What is the one thing your spouse does that you are eternally grateful for? =) Among the millions of things Dafina does, the biggest one is that Dafina takes the weight of all the responsibilities of our home, while also being CEO of her own company that spans multiple states, when I have to work early morning hours or travel for a television shoot. Being in media means keeping odd hours, and for most of our marriage I’ve worked on early shows, which means I’m frequently gone in the morning. And she manages our lives, and our kids lives, every time I’ve had to do it. I wouldn’t have a career without her.
What is one piece of advice you would pass along to other dads? What is happening now, especially if it is trials in your life or marriage, unforeseen circumstances with your kids, whatever it may be…is just the now. It’s not forever. And good things that you might not expect might be around the corner. You just have to persevere, and keep being someone that shows up for your family, no matter what the situation.
QUICK THIS OR THAT:
At a movie: Candy or Popcorn? Popcorn!
Cook or order in? Cook! I’m a healthy dude, I like to know what I’m eating!
Cake or Ice Cream? Cake…always
Iced Coffee or Hot Coffee? Hot coffee. I’ve never even had iced!
Beach or Mountains? Beach! Shout out to Compo!
Puzzle or Board Game? Board Game. Life
Reading or writing? Reading
Before bed: Social media or book/TV? Book
Watch or play sports? Used to be play….now it’s all watch.
Stay in or go out? Stay in
Comedy or Drama? Can I please say Horror? I’ll take that over comedy or drama any day. 🙂